Category Archives: Mindfulness

3 Poisons, Interdependence, & Unpleasant Emotion as Information

In Buddhist traditions, unnecessary suffering is caused by the three poisons: passion, aggression, and ignorance. Ignorance may be the most important of these three. It refers to ignorance of the fact that there is no stable, continuous self. There is no self, we are interdependent There certainly can be a stable story of myself: I […]

The Law of Three Choices

They bug me! 4 things you can do, only 1 of them is healthy.

Intimacy Strategies for Thriving

By using intimacy strategies rather than simply focusing on avoidance strategies we can live healthier lives for ourselves, our loved ones, and the planet.

The Unholy Trinity: Perceptive, Defensive, Not self-aware

There are two critical necessities for a good relationship: (1) Get along, (2) Talk skillfully when you can’t. The presence of the Unholy Trinity make both very difficult. […]

A Reply to Kahlil Gibran’s Observation about Optimism and the Rose

“The optimist sees the rose and not its thorns; the pessimist stares at the thorns, oblivious to the rose.” – Kahlil Gibran. We might add: The wise see the whole rose and thus appreciate all aspects of its beauty without injury.

Saving Our Children: Connecting to Ourselves for Sustainable Well-being (video)

Video of a recent 60-minute talk with music in 9, bite-sized bits, entitled: “Saving Rumi: Connecting to Ourselves for Sustainable Well-being”. It’s a good summary of the sustainable well-being project. Through words and music, the talk discusses how our current way of life is the largest failure in human history, advocates making changes to maximize sustainable well-being, describes some psychological principles needed, and suggests solutions, ranging from a scientific and cultural project called “Open Source Life Design”, to solutions being modeled by pioneering communities throughout the world, to an incubating idea for a Community Supported Sustainable Lake House (CSSL).

Cocaine-Firefly Principle

This Cocaine-firefly Principle is potentially very important given the need for us to maximize sustainable well-being by enjoying more and using less.

Enlightenment eliminates unnecessary suffering but not pain

“…to feel deeply and precisely with full awareness is what opens us to both joy and sorrow…you can’t dip your face to the stream and say, ‘I’ll only drink the hydrogen and not the oxygen.’…the life of feeling is no different. We cannot drink only of happiness or sorrow and have life remain life…Thus, to […]

Unrealistic Optimism: The Dark Side of Looking on the Bright Side

It doesn’t matter whether we view a glass as half-full or half-empty unless that view affects the risks we take in our behavior. If we collapse in despair because we are too half-empty, that is not helpful. If we are an overjoyed bull in a china shop because we are too half-full, that is also not helpful. The point isn’t whether the glass is half-empty or half-full but whether this amount of water is enough for the purpose at hand.